Some people aren’t busy — they just don’t plan on making time for you.
I met this guy on Bumble — let’s call him Jay.
At first, I was excited. He looked cute, his bio was funny, and he messaged first with a clever opener. Seemed like someone who actually put in effort.
What stood out most was how consistent he was. Every morning, like clockwork, I’d get a “Good morning ☀️” from him. Sometimes with a little life update: what he had for dinner, a podcast he liked, even how tired he was from work.
At first, I thought, “Wow, someone who actually cares. This could go somewhere.”
We talked a lot — but meeting up? Never came up
After a few days, we were chatting regularly. We had conversations about music, weekend plans, favorite shows. It felt easy, like we were slowly getting to know each other.
So I figured, let’s move it forward.
I suggested we meet for coffee sometime — something casual. He replied quickly:
“Haha, this week’s kinda packed! Let’s do it soon though 😅”
Okay, fine. People get busy. No big deal.
But days went by, and still — nothing. He kept texting every morning, telling me about his gym routine or some meme he saw, but he never brought up meeting.
I asked again a week later, just to be sure.
Same answer: “Ugh, work’s wild right now. But definitely, we should meet!”
That’s when it hit me:
He wasn’t too busy.
He just didn’t want to meet.
It wasn’t effort — it was boredom
Looking back, I don’t think Jay was trying to lead me on.
He just liked the idea of someone to text.
It gave him a tiny dopamine hit, a routine. Like a virtual pen pal — without any real investment.
I’ve learned this is super common in dating apps.
Some people swipe, match, chat… but have zero intention of taking it further.
And when you realize that? It kinda stings.
If someone wants to see you — they will see you
A friend once told me:
“A man who’s into you won’t just ‘check in.’ He’ll show up.”
That line stayed with me. Because it’s true.
The people who care won’t hide behind daily texts. They’ll ask when you’re free. They’ll pick a time and place. They’ll want to see your smile in real life — not just a selfie.
If this is happening to you, here’s your reminder:
You’re not asking for too much.
You’re asking for someone who means it.
It’s easy to get flattered by consistency. But don’t mistake routine for real interest.
If they’re not making time, they’re not making you a priority.
You deserve more than “Good morning.”
